My Beautiful Rescue

I've been dancing on the tops of buildings at the top of my lungs I'm singing you a song, don't you leave me alone. My bones were shattered, my pride lays shattered well I'll trample my pride and tell the whole world to dance with me.
I'm falling more in love, with every single word you say, I'm falling head over heels for you.
I've been dancing on the tops of buildings with you.

I haven't posted anything for a long time, and I'm not really sure why. I mean I really like writing. And I used to write everyday. I should start again.

But on the upside things have been going really good lately. Really good.
Last time I updated I had met Chris and we were just dating. And now.. We're married!
We tied the knot on March 6th 2010. We got married at the church that my parents got married at, and it was wonderful. The reception was entirely amazing too.
Things have changed alot, but for the best.
We moved into our first apartment together. It's not the nicest apartment in the world, but we're just starting off.
We also got our first puppy together. His name is Tippy. And he is the cutest little shit head ever.. Let me explain.. He's so adorable and cute when he's cuddling with you and giving you kisses and when he is sleepy. But when he's hyper he bounces off the walls, chews up everything in sight, and when there's nothing out for him to chew he rips up the carpet, and he also eats everything that fits in his mouth. Basically, he drives me insane but I can't help but love him. Like right now, he's curled up next to me sleeping. And I love him now, but when he wakes up is another story..
Things are pretty wonderful. I mean we have our good days and bad days, but nothing is going to stop us. There's still alot that I want to do, and hopefully I can find the strength and drive to do it all.

The Loves of My Life

<3 My Amazing Boyfriend <3

Butterflies!

He stopped by!
One word. Breathtaking!
He's going to pick me up tonight.
CAN'T WAIT!
Ah, I'm speechless!

39th and Butterflies

You were in my dream before I even knew that there was a you and me. Now I can't wait to see your smile, when I wake up each day it makes it worth while with the kinda love you plant inside. Specially with a heart so empty as mine. All your soft tenderness is the one thing that I don't wanna miss.

I went on a date last night. With a guy I met on 39th.
His name is Chris. He's 20. He loves cars. And drifting. He's cute. Smart. Passionate. Courteous. He's a gentleman. Walks me to my door at the end of the night.
I really like this guy. He's stopping by in a little bit to say hi. And I'm so excited. But nervous too.
He gives me butterflies and I can't stop smiling.
We went to the lake last night and watched the sun go down. We sat at the edge of the lake and we cuddled and kissed under the blanket. I giggled a lot. He thinks it's cute. And I love that.
He holds my hand even though his car is standard. He doesn't let go, he shifts with his other hand. It's adorable.
I had an amazing time, and I can't wait for the second date..
He's on his way, I have to find my minty lip gloss!
I'll update later!

Gotta' let the truth be told...

For a second I wish the tide would swallow every inch of this city, like a thousand miles of fire.

I know a lot of people that I wish I could help. It’s the worst feeling in the world knowing that someone is hurting on the inside and you cant do anything about it. How can you convince someone that they are worth something, that they deserve to be here, that they have a purpose in life? For example, my friend is possibly the sweetest guy ever. I mean he’s incredibly smart and he has such passion for his hobbies. A lot of things haven’t gone as planned for him but he’s working on it. I know he’s not happy and I really feel like there’s nothing that I can do for him especially since he past drug problems. How can I show him that there is more to life than meth? How can I tell him that there are so many things in his life that are good? He needs to stay around positive people. I just sometimes feel like being there for him and being his friend isn’t enough.

I'm back in Oklahoma. Whoops, typo "Oklahomo"
I've been in Houston for a couple of months. I like it there. It wasn't what I expected. I guess since last summer was so awesome.
I never really liked it here in Oklahoma, but I have my family here. But I have family it two different states. It's really hard to choose between two states and two families.
I think a big reason why I was so disappointed about the trip was because I was hoping to talk to Kevin. I still love him, and that's why it sucked so bad when I didn't even get to talk to him.
I wish that I could get over him, but I just can't. I'm stupid.
Maybe it really wasn't meant to happen..
I'm fucked up, and I know it.
There has to be something wrong with me.
I wish I could figure out what it is that I desperately need to be happy.

Things That I Love

Change everything you are
and everything you were
your number has been called

Fights and battles have begun
revenge will surely come
your hard times are ahead

Best you've got to be the best
you've got to change the world
and use this chance to be heard
your time is now

.. Maybe just for a while..

so things have been a little different lately..
i recently just got back from Houston, i spent about almost 2 months there. it really wasn't what i expected it to be.. i guess i just just so excited because i expected it to be just like last summer. that was the most -hands down- best summer of my life. i honestly miss the way things used to be.
my feelings towards things have changed a lot. i wish that i could get that back.

-porque no te marchas-

i'm trying to get a few things back in order. i don't know why but i really love spanish music, it makes me happy. it's quite possible that it reminds me of things that i wish i never had to let go. i believe that things "happen for a reason" but sometimes i wish that i didn't. mostly because i don't know if that should stop me from pursuing things that i desperately want. and especially if what you want, that didn't "happen" doesn't work.. what now? it wasn't "meant to happen?" i sometimes have a hard time believing that. but i try to stick to it. a lot of really good things have happened because of bad things that have happened. and even though they sucked at first, i'm very grateful for that.
... i know that i'm not perfect. no one is. but i do like the way i am. and if you don't like me then fuck you. =]
but there are some things that i wish that i could fix about myself.. i don't have a bad temper or anything, i just sometimes get irritated easily. and that makes me feel bad.. i don't mean to.
.things i like.
blueberry muffins
iced coffee
getting high
duelo and aventura
chicken nuggets
stickers
hot sauce
holding hands
piano
painting
rain

I tried my best to keep my distance from your dress
but call-response overturns convictions every time.
My memory cannot recall: a wave of alcohol
we shared a cigarette and shave the hours off.

hands against the wall motherfucker!

ABC-Z

A - Age: 19 years young
B - Bed size: Full.
C - Chore you hate: Dishes!
D - Dog's name: Potassium! AKA Tassie.
E - Essential start your day item: Glass of water and a cigarette.
F - Favorite color(s): Purple.
G - Gold or Silver: Silver.
H - Height: 4' 9"
I - Instruments you play: Nada.
J - Job title: Doing jack shit at the moment.
K - Kid(s): None. I hate kids.
L - Living arrangements: You know, you know.
M - Mom's name: April.
N - Nicknames: D Bibbles, DB, Bib, D Berry, Lil Deezy. Hahaha, oh Stillwater fun.
O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: A lot of times, But never for me.
P - Pet Peeve: Speed bumps, papercuts, condensation, loud chewing, inkless pens, the radio.
Q - Quote from a movie: I did it when I was a freshman, and you'll do it when you're seniors. Now fry like bacon you little freshman piggies. FRY! *Dazed and Confused.
R - Relationship? Smashinship fuck ships. Ha. None.
S - Siblings: Cori,
T - Time you wake up: When I gotsta'.
U - Underwear: They are black.
V - Vegetable you dislike: Mushrooms, olives, onions (is that a vegetable?)
W - Workout style: Walking around aimlessly?
X - X-rays you've had: None.
Y - Yesterday's best moment: Basketball and pizza dance fun.
Z - Zoo favorite: The whole damn thing!

My Family

So.. This is my family.